50 & Holding

The trials, tribulations and unexpected joys of being 50+

Friends Forever July 4, 2010

Filed under: aging,friendship,life,love,Uncategorized — assistingu1st @ 2:13 pm
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Have you noticed that the older you get, the harder it is to make friends.  Oh, you have lots of acquaintances that weave in and out of your life.  But chances are, the friends you’ve had since you were a kid or a teenager, are the ones you call your friends today.

My best friend is Lynette.  I have known her since we were young and hot and you couldn’t tell us a thing! I spent the day with her recently and we reminisced about some of the crazy things we used to do.  We are both a lot calmer (I guess that’s cause we’re older) these days, but we still get into some mischief every now and then.

Over the years Lynette has lived in different cities other than Detroit.  At times, we may have only seen each other once or twice a year.  Sometimes, not even that.  She is the type of friend that you don’t  have to hold her hand and babysit.  You know how some friends have a fit if you don’t call them everyday.  But Lynette is not like that and neither am I.  Actually I prefer that we don’t talk everyday and she understands this.   When we do talk, it’s like it was yesterday and we just pick up right where we left off.

Another reason Lynette and I have been friends for almost 30 years, is that we genuinely like each other.  You know how you hear “so-called girlfriends” talk about each other behind their backs and refer to their “friend” as that bitch under their breath.  Not me and Lynette.  We have never infringed upon each other in any way.  Our criticisms are few and we just accept each other as we are.  Friendship with Lynette is easy because she is easygoing and on the whole, so am I.  She is like the sister I never had.  And I have a sister, but we are not that close due to her crazy husband.  But that’s another story.

Bottom line is I love Lynette and our friendship! Have you told your best friend how much they mean to you.  If not, do it today.  Their friendship is precious and can last forever!


A Bout with The Gout…and it’s winning..for now July 20, 2009

Filed under: health — assistingu1st @ 1:53 am
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I have come down with  The Gout.  That’s what they called it when I was a kid.  I  remember hearing people say, “Grandma got the gout”.  Even then I knew it was such a bad mamma jamma that it had its own title – THE  GOUT.

As a kid I never knew what it was, but I knew it sounded way serious.  Well now that I’m fifty and holding I sure as hell know what The Gout is and it is definitely a worthy opponent.  As a matter of fact, right now it is kicking my butt.

Two years ago I woke up in the middle of the night with a deep persistent, throbbing pain in my big toe on the right foot.  It hurt so bad that I couldn’t even stand to touch it.  After  a couple days of being in excruciating pain, hobbling around on one foot and hoping it would go away, I finally took myself to the doctor.  She told me that  she suspected that I had gout.  I’m thinking, I can’t have gout, that’s what old people get”.  She went on to explain  about uric acid levels and that mine were quite high, but at this time I’m still a little confused as to what the hell gout really is.  After doing some Internet research, I found out that gout is actually a form of arthritis.  Hell just what I need – arthritis – another sign of my seemingly rapid descent into senior citizenship.

Now this lastest attack has lasted over five days.  I can’t walk, I can’t sleep, and I am barely getting around.  I’ve been taking all the prescribed medication – colchicine and indomethacine, but they are not helping.  Now it’s time to try some natural remedies to see if they can help.  I’ve been hearing that organic apple cider vinegar relieves the pain and helps in stopping recurrent attacks.  At this point they certainly can’t hurt.  The Gout may be winning this battle, but I’ll be damned  if it wins the war.


My Legacy July 19, 2009

Filed under: life — assistingu1st @ 4:52 pm
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Since the death of Michael Jackson (I was a big fan), I’ve been thinking about my legacy.  What will I leave to the world when I die.  For Michael, it will be his legacy as the “King of Pop”.  He will live on through his music.

I, on the other hand have no Thriller or Billie Jean to exemplify my genius.  No one will ever no my name except for my family, and they often forget that except for when they want something.  So what will I leave to the world once I’m gone.  For me I hope that it will be the kindness and love that I have shown other people. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no Mother Theresa, but I try to be just a little friendlier, a little kinder to people I meet throughout my life.  It takes so little to smile or just say hello.   If someone feels just a little better because of a small act of kindness, the world is just a little bit better.

I believe that kindness and love live on in the people we have touched.  It’s sort of like the  “pay it forword” concept.  One act of kindness  begets another act of kindness.  I may not die famous and my name on everyone’s lips, but I know that I have touched other people in a meaningful way and hopefully you as well.  So here’s to kindness and love – may they live on forever.


Going Thru The Change… Hoping to Come Thru Sane June 26, 2008

Filed under: aging,health — assistingu1st @ 1:54 am
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The other day I was listening to a popular local radio show that featured an “expert” gynecologist talking about menopause. What struck me about her was that she seemed to spouting the same medical techno babble that you would expect from an uninformed man. Women were calling in describing the different symptoms they were experiencing. This so-called expert was shooting them down left and right. One of the symptoms were those dreaded “hot flashes”. You know, those “private summers” or “power surges” that for some seemed to be emanating from their legs up. This “expert” said it was “physiologically impossible”. I really hate it when a doctor or anyone else for that matter just about calls you crazy when you are trying to describe what your body is experiencing. There are a few things that can trigger a hot flash. For me, if I get really ticked off about something, it can trigger one. So you can imagine by listening to this doctor I was literally “fuming”. Also I discovered that wine is a trigger. Other women reported that “sweets” such as chocolate triggered a hot flash. Wow, bummer!

Anyway, the last caller in the segment asked if there was something that could be done about the weight she was gaining around the middle. This so-called expert told her to watch what she was putting in her mouth – that there were good carbs and bad carbs. The caller sounded bewildered and slightly frustrated. This doctor was a complete idiot!! By this time I was totally infuriated!!! This doctor obviously knew nothing about menopause other than what she had read in some outdated medical book.

If you are Going Thru the Change – Fear Not! You can get to the light at the end of the tunnel. First, you have got to research and read for yourself. Most doctors know very little about menopause. Much of their time was spent learning about your child-bearing years and they know very little about the last half of a woman’s life. In my opinion, a caring doctor would never discount what symptoms a patient is describing. If you say your legs are hot, than by golly you got hot legs! (Remember Rod Stewart’s song “Hot Leg”, anyway I digress.)  Secondly, most women experience weight gain around their middles. During menopause estrogen levels decrease significantly. The fat cells in the abdomen most resemble estrogen cells, thus the reason for the ever-increasing middle. It has very little to do with good carbs, bad carbs. If only it was that simple. Thirdly, check out the miracle of adding soy to your diet. Lots of stuff on the Internet about – check it out. I’m going thru the menopause tunnel, but I do see the light!